This week, I discovered that I am pregnant again. I have been waiting and hoping for this to happen ever since November, when I lost my first pregnancy; however, now that it's here, I find myself lost somewhere between disbelief and fear. It's hard to believe that it's for real, as I'm not feeling very pregnant. But three tests told me that I am, including the one at the doctor. And knowing that I am growing a baby inside me fills me with the fear that whatever happened last time, will happen again. What if I'm not able to grow and carry a child to term? I'm afraid to get too excited or too attached to the idea. At the same time, I want to tell everyone I know and start planning for the life-changing event of having a child.
My first appointment is April 7, which is in 18 days. This is when I'll know whether things are progressing normally or not. I know making it 8 weeks doesn't mean I'm out of the woods, but it will make me feel better about the whole thing, since my last 8 week appointment was when my doctor first knew something was very wrong.
Wish me luck!
